Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Where Do You Stand?

Yesterday I saw this programme on Discovery channel called Wife Swap, curiosity aroused I watched that programme. It should actually have been Mom Swap. This is what it was; They select two families and show us how each family is raising their children. The first family had five children and both the parents had brought the children with a very militaristic kind of upbringing. All the chores was written out and duties delegated and they had to complete it and earn stars. If they were found to default in their duties then they would get their toy confiscated and towards the end of the week they would have an auction where the child with the highest number of stars could bid and have that if he wanted it. Also the maximum number of stars that the child got would get a privilege of one hour to spend with his Dad!!!!!!!!!!

The other family had three children and there the mother had to take care of everything and the children and dad would just sit around not helping her in single chore and were arrogant and the husband would infact join with the kids in humiliating his wife and also he would want his wife to be well groomed and dressed at all times of the day. the wife would bear all this as her attitude was that she would do anything for her family.

Then they had to swap places and live with the other family for two weeks. The first week they just have to follow the family rules and the second week the husband and children had to listen to the rules that the new mother imposed on them!!!!!

It was really good to see how both the families benifitted in different ways. The first family became more freindly and the father became more accesible to his children and the second family became much more disciplined and learnt to respect the woman of the family more. I really enjoyed this programme and please watch this programme if it ever is telecast.

This is were I feel how much of discipline and how much leeway can we give our children? Many a time I find parents are either too strict or too lenient in bringing up their children. Sometimes the children are pampered so much that later children find it difficult to listen to a NO from their parents. Infact did you hear a child commiting suicide just because the parents did'nt give in to his wish that one time! So shocking right?

Don't you think we should also refrain from saying you are grown up now and better behave yourselves to a five year old child just because he or she is the first born. Children even when they are ten ,eleven still need to be reminded gently of the rules that are laid. They forget and need to be reminded. At times we definitely I think need to be tough and stand by certain basic rules laid out for them. This would certainly go a long way when they go out into the world and when they are on their own.

So tell me as a parent or some of them who read this blog as young adults what is your opinion on discipline and how did your parents go about things which may or may not have helped you now in your present day. How and what kind of discipline do you use and how effective do you feel it is?

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